Tuesday, March 10, 2015

And still not Matched yet...

Sometimes I just browse thru profiles on Match.com like some may browse for shoes. You occasionally click on ones that you know you won't like, but you need a second look to see if you are seeing it correctly. This next email comes from a dude that I looked at his profile (& did nothing, no wink, no like..aka not interested.) But here's what he pitched my way.


"Make me laugh . I 
challenge you to a joke off 
?!!! Then a cheer competition . What's up 
now ?!?!!!!!!! :p "

No. Just no.

Up next comes an email from probably one of the strangest looking guys I've ever seen.

"Hey! You sound fun. I don't know if I've ever heard a girl say "I love makeup and girly things."...and not trying to sound like a valley girl. But then you said you write a style blog, so I believe you. That sound pretty awesome. 
Not that I'm into makeup and girly stuff, but I'm definitely into people doing their own thing and carving out their own place in the world. That's awesome.
I bet you and I don't have a whole lot in common on the surface things; but for some reason, I have a feeling you and I would find a deeper commonality.
Plus you're a total babe and probably out of my league, but if I never said/typed anything to you I'd never know anyway....so BAM...do with me what you will, Universe. -Marty"

Hi Marty. Here's a fun fact about me, when I'm extremely uncomfortable I start to sound like a valley girl. No like really, I do! I'm glad to know you aren't into makeup or girly things, cause well that'd just be weird. You are certainly correct when you say that we don't have a lot in common. I'm not saying that to be funny, I'm 100% serious. I took a peek at your profile. We literally have nothing in common. Well, we have one thing in common-we're both single. Did you really say you are looking for someone to do "even a little harmless crime here and there"?? Last I checked, Bonnie and Clyde didn't end well. Well, the '03 Bonnie and Clyde are still going strong-I see you, B and Hov. I bet you don't even know who that is, huh? Yeah, you said it best-nothing in common. Thanks for the compliment, I've never been called a "total babe" then again, I was under 13 for most of the 90's. You can thank the Universe, you ended up on my pretty cool blog, and I know about 4 people, 5 if we remind my Aunt that will read this...lots of luck finding your cellmate!

And last, but certainly not least. I bring you this.

"Equal parts animal lover. 1 dog and 2 cats.....I have to ask the important question..do they like each other? ;)"

I know for sure that I am not the only person to have ever a dog and cats living together. Why is this such a hot topic?? Anyways, for your reading pleasure, I actually wrote this fella back. Here's how the convo went...
Him: "Equal parts animal lover. 1 dog and 2 cats.....I have to ask the important question..do they like each other? ;)"
Me: "Not at all. It's like the Hunger Games here daily."
Him: "Oh boy lol :) how long have you had the little ones for?"
Me: "Nothing little about them. Cats are both 20 pounds each and the dog is a Great Dane."
Him: "I use the term "little" as a cute term...doesn't necessarily mean their light weight :) they sound great :)" "You have beautiful eyes"
Me: "Thanks. They are. I'm planning on getting a llama this summer. Do you have any pets?"
Him: "At the moment I don't but it is definitely in my future. My job does not give me the amount of time it takes to give them enough attention. I used to do cat rescue a while back :)"
Me: "Animals are great! But unfortunately, if you don't have enough time for a pet, you don't have enough time for me. Good luck to you!"

In real life, it's always harmonious here, okay for the most part. And none of my babies are even close to 20 lbs. And for what it's worth, I felt bad for leading him on for those short 10 minutes...so Karma, if you're listening to me, I'm sorry.